Did you know that, as with parenting, there are multiple grandparenting styles? If you're curious about what category you fall into, keep reading—we’ve unpacked some of the most common approaches to help you figure out what works for you.
New grandparent? Congratulations, and welcome to an exciting time of sweet moments, joyful milestones, cuddles, giggles and more. Being a grandparent is an opportunity to pivot from your parenting style with your own kids. It’s a clean slate with more boundaries and less responsibility. If you’re wondering what type of grandparent you’re going to be, it’s worth considering the different approaches many people take. It’s important to note that there’s really no one-size-fits-all regarding your grandparenting style, but here are a few options that might be a good start.
The Adventurous Grandparent
If fun is your middle name, this adventure-seeking style might be the way for you. You can plan trips and scavenger hunts, go on adventures, host sleepovers and create lasting memories with your grandkids. The idea here is that you create core memories by being the one who spearheads regular doses of magic.
The Involved Grandparent
It’s easier to adopt this grandparenting style if you live nearby, but an involved grandparent shows up regularly to help with homework, provide childcare when available, and attend events and extracurriculars. It is possible to be an involved grandparent from afar, if you prioritize visits and take advantage of technology through video and phone calls and group chats.
The Compassionate Grandparent
Of all the grandparenting styles, the compassionate grandparent is the most common and balanced. If this is your approach, you are likely close to your grandchildren, both emotionally and in terms of distance. But the boundary with a compassionate grandparent is that you know your role as a grandparent and do not take responsibility for your grandchildren.
The Remote Grandparent
Remote or distant grandparents are physically removed and sometimes emotionally distant. This grandparenting style isn’t always one you choose, but one that you fall into if there is discourse between you and your own children, if you live far away or if there are other more involved grandparents who see your grandchildren more regularly. If this isn’t your style by choice, we recommend speaking asking a professional for help, to teach you how to work with your own kids to change the set-up.
The Wise Grandparent
While you enjoy a close bond with your grandchildren, this grandparenting style is one that is based in sharing your wisdom and experience through advice, life lessons and also via tapping in the things that your grandchildren share with you. After a while, the wise grandparent will start to field calls from grandchildren seeking advice or an opinion (and then you’ll know your work here is done!).
Finding the best grandparenting style for you might take some trial and error. But it ultimately comes down to your personality, lifestyle and relationship with your children and grandchildren. When deciding on your grandparenting style, think about what you’re good at — can you coach a team? Are you a good teacher? Do you have time to jump in with childcare? Also, talk to your kids to understand their parenting style, boundaries, wants and needs.
