Supporting teen mental health isn’t always straightforward. Here’s what parents need to know about some of the most common challenges, from social anxiety and self-esteem to social media use and sleep.

A handful of years ago, ParentsCanada and Common Compass conducted a survey asking Canadian parents to identify their biggest challenges and concerns about their pre-teens’ and teens’ mental health.

The findings highlighted issues that continue to be familiar to many families:

Sleep was a top concern, with 52.5 per cent of parents worrying that their children were going to bed too late or not sleeping enough.

Social anxiety was another concern—38.1 per cent of parents identified “social anxiety” as a challenge, with another 34.5 per cent reporting challenges making friends.

Low self-esteem and social media use were also top of mind: 25.2 per cent of parents were worried about low mood and depression, while 17.3 per cent were concerned about perfectionism. When it came to online interactions, 38.1 per cent of parents were worried about social media use.

We also asked parents whether schools were helping when it came to their pre-teens’ and teens’ mental health. Fifty-two per cent said general awareness campaigns and motivational speakers at assemblies were the most visible forms of support, but they felt schools lacked a broader strategy or sufficient access to student mental health training.

Parents are not alone

Supporting a teen through mental health challenges can be difficult and, at times, confusing—especially when parents are also juggling the demands of work, family life and financial stress. If you’re unsure about what your teen needs or how best to help, you’re far from the only parent trying to figure it out.

“Parents are frustrated at the lack of timely and accessible mental health supports for their children,” says Leisha Zamecnik, executive director of Common Compass, a non-profit organization that works with schools to develop and facilitate evidence-informed mental health programs. “It’s difficult and confusing for them to navigate the system and they want the knowledge and skills to support their child’s mental health. Parents have shared with us that they are particularly looking for support with social anxiety, healthy social media use, low self-esteem and sleep.”

“My hope is to help assure them that when they look around at other parents at sports practice, parent council or on social media, they know that nearly every one of them is struggling with how to best support their children,” she adds. “As parents we have a lot in common with one another. We need to raise one another up.”

How to help with social anxiety

Teens tend to do well when they know what to expect, and unfamiliar or unpredictable social situations can be especially challenging for a young person experiencing social anxiety. Whether it’s starting a new school, joining an activity, going to a party or navigating a changing friendship group, helping teens prepare for situations that make them anxious can make them feel more manageable.

“Routine and predictability are key,” says Zamecnik. “We need to help teens understand what to expect and how to prepare for situations that they may find anxiety-provoking. Helping them split larger, seemingly daunting social outings into smaller, more manageable steps can help them to gain confidence.”

Parents can help by breaking an intimidating social situation into smaller steps rather than expecting a teen to tackle the whole thing at once. That might mean visiting a new school before the first day, arriving at an event early with a friend or starting with a smaller social gathering before working up to something bigger.

It’s also important to remember that teens may not always recognize or be able to articulate what they’re struggling with. If social anxiety is interfering with school, friendships, activities or everyday life, additional support may be needed.

How to manage social media use

Even before social media became such a major part of everyday life, parents and teachers were busy supporting teens as they matured. While social media use is not always a direct cause of mental health challenges, it is a nearly inescapable part of daily life with some consequences, and teens need to be shown healthy ways of using social media platforms.

Sensational stories about social media may be causing parents and teens more stress and anxiety than its actual use does. It is important to recognize that the information we receive about social media may be holding us in a negative use cycle, so it’s helpful to take time to create a balanced approach.

“I think it’s important that parents explain how addictive social media is designed to be,” says Zamecnik. “Algorithms are intentionally created to draw you in and keep you there for as long as possible. This is how they profit. Education is key. You can also ask them how much social media would be ideal for them and help them stay within those limits.”

While excessive use of social media can expose teens to harmful behaviours such as cyberbullying and increased self-criticism through comparing their lives with snippets of others, these behaviours are often learned offline. Teens who socialize online and offline can benefit from finding a healthy balance between the two. Work with your teen to talk openly about how social media use affects their physical and mental health, why your family has certain boundaries and what healthy use looks like. And remember that the rules are a lot easier to sell if the adults in the house are willing to follow them, too.

How to raise self-esteem

Teen self-esteem is influenced by many things, including relationships at home and school, friendships, activities and the messages young people absorb about themselves. Social media can add another layer by making it incredibly easy for teens to compare their everyday lives with carefully selected versions of everyone else’s.

“The single most important thing a parent can do to strengthen the parent-child bond is to really listen to their child,” says Zamecnik. “Over time, this strengthens the relationship and contributes to improved self-esteem.”

Because it’s difficult to see our children in emotional pain, parents often reflexively try to make negative feelings disappear. “Everyone hates me at school” might immediately be met with, “That’s not true, honey. Don’t say that!” But reassuring them isn’t necessarily the same as hearing them.

“Validation is not agreement,” adds Zamecnik. “It is acknowledging the emotion that the young person is experiencing. Instead of saying, ‘That’s not true,’ try something like, ‘It sounds like you are feeling really lonely at school. That must be hard.’ Then pause. Wait. Listen. Ask an open-ended question like, ‘What’s making you feel this way?’ Then listen some more. Resist the urge to problem solve!”

Helping teens develop confidence in hobbies, interests or skills can also support self-esteem. Physical activity can help reduce stress and has benefits for both physical and mental wellbeing.

How to find a sleep schedule that works

Teenagers are biologically wired to fall asleep and wake up later than younger children and adults, which can put their natural sleep rhythms at odds with early school start times, extracurricular activities and family schedules.

“School scheduling was not created to be centered around what is best for adolescents,” says Zamecnik. “It’s largely a function of the rhythms of larger society, particularly the work schedule. There is no question that later start times would be beneficial for students.”

That means getting enough sleep can require some deliberate planning. Encourage your teen to maintain a reasonably consistent sleep and wake time, while looking honestly at whether homework, activities, socializing or other commitments are regularly pushing bedtime too late.

“Try to be as consistent with sleep as possible each day of the week and minimize changes from weekends to weekdays,” adds Zamecnik. “Encourage short naps since longer naps disrupt nighttime sleep. And, of course, role model good sleep habits.”

Gaps in mental health support

ParentsCanada and Common Compass also asked Canadian parents to identify gaps in the teen mental health supports available to their families. About 19 per cent of participants reported a lack of resources in general, including therapists and services; 16.5 per cent identified waiting lists and wait times; 14 per cent mentioned cost or insurance coverage; and another 14 per cent pointed to general inaccessibility.

“We need to be providing supports where students already spend time – in school – rather than expecting them to navigate complex systems to get the right support,” says Zamecnik. “School social workers are working tirelessly. Principals and teachers need support and they need greater capacity to create school environments that are thoughtfully designed to promote social-emotional wellbeing.”

Along with accessible support from trained professionals, parents need knowledge and practical tools to help their teens navigate challenges such as social anxiety, social media use, low self-esteem and sleep. Parents don't have to have all the answers—but knowing what to watch for, how to listen and when to seek additional support can make an important difference.

For more information on workshops, visit www.commoncompass.com.

Originally published in June 2022. Updated in August 2026.