My teenage children walk into my parents’ house and are almost instantly offered a snack from the pantry full of treats in bulk-sized containers, or a drink from the fridge (chocolate milk, of course, and ginger ale for my eldest because it’s his favourite. Grandparents know this kind of stuff).
This has been the way since before my parents moved closer to us almost 15 years ago. Their home has always been a place of happy indulgences and treats. The same goes for my mother-in-law’s home. The oven seems to be running constantly, with freshly baked goods cooling on the counter
Making memories with the grandkids
Despite knowing that their grandparents’ houses are going to be a gastronomical delight, both houses are also places where they can make themselves at home. I love that my kids and my nieces and nephews have always felt so comfortable in their grandparents’ homes.
These are gathering places full of love, meals and memories. I know this isn’t always the case, and for some families, kids may be reluctant to visit with their grandparents. As tempting as it may sound, these homes shouldn’t be confused as places where they are completely free to do whatever they want. Although a funny thing happens with grandparents — they somehow let their grandkids get away with things their children never could have.
How to manage discipline as a grandparent
First, let’s remember that discipline doesn’t necessarily look the way it did when your own kids were growing up. Your kids may have a completely different or preferred approach to handling certain situations. No TV? Sitting on a time-out chair? Redirecting or changing the activity? Gently encouraging
feelings to be shared? Talk to the parents about how they want you to handle disciplinary situations. You’ll be able to support them and your grandkids when you have the full picture. This communication helps prevent surprises, maintains consistency and sets boundaries for everyone.
If you have your own preferences or rules that you want your family and grandkids to follow in your home, make sure to share them, too. It’s easier to set expectations and come up with a plan that works for everyone. For example, if you have an area of your home where you don’t want the kids to play or eat meals, make sure everyone is aware.
Can you really spoil your grandkids too much?
The grandparents in my life would argue no, but maybe the answer is more complicated than that. When it comes to offering indulgences or treats, start by having a chat with the parents. Sure, it’s great when the kids light up at the thought of endless bowls of ice cream and all the cartoons they can handle. However, Mom or Dad may want to have a say about things that may be inconsistent or cause issues with what is allowed at home. By communicating, you can be sure that you're doing it in a way that works for everybody. This doesn’t mean you can’t spoil them from time to time. Having that surprise treat can help create a bond with your grandchildren.
