You can't tell us Mrs Claus isn't the backbone of the holidays. There's just too much evidence to support the theory that she's really running the show. But maybe it's time for a revolution.
In my favourite Christmas movie of all time (One Magic Christmas, a 1985 gem starring a young Mary Steenburgen, partly filmed in Toronto), the main character is a little girl named Abby who takes a trip to the North Pole. There’s a complicated explanation as to why and how she ends up there (it’s worth a watch to get the full story!), but at the end of her visit, Santa is getting ready to leave and Mrs Claus appears with his gorgeous red coat in hand. She has just finished mending it, and Santa absently looks at her like, “Why are you standing there holding my jacket, lady?”
She patiently reminds him about the hole she fixed and holds it out while he slips into it. As a kid, I thought nothing of this. But as an adult, I’ve thought more than once, “Oh, you know Mrs Claus is the one holding it all together. Santa didn’t even remember the damn hole.”
And in the households of most of my friends, this holds true. The in-house Mrs Clauses are the ones creating the holiday magic, making the lists and checking them twice. And by lists, I don’t mean naughty and nice. I mean shopping for presents (allll the presents), planning meals and making treats, organizing travel or hosting plans, etc.—you name it, it’s the women in families who are doing it. So, it’s probably no surprise that, according to a 2021 survey by the Canadian Mental Health Association, one in four women find themselves depressed by the holiday season. It’s too much freaking work.
So, the question is, what can be done about it? Mrs Claus is the unsung hero of Christmas, no doubt, but I’m not sure the answer is just to revere her and give credit where credit is due (check out this TikTok from @pennymiddleton for a funny but too realistic take). We should do that, but maybe the answer is more complex. Maybe Mrs Claus needs to revolt. Maybe Mrs Claus needs to insist on both equal credit and equal workload, rather than being buried under invisible labour. Maybe Mrs Claus shouldn’t just sit at home on Christmas Eve while Santa gets all the glory. (You can’t tell me the reindeer don’t like Mrs Claus better anyway—you know she’s the one making sure they’re fed and groomed.) Maybe it’s time for a Mrs Claus uprising.
Okay, I know she’s fictional. But it’s the principle behind it all. Maybe every Mrs Claus in every household needs to draw a line in the tinsel and either leave things off of the endless holiday prep lists or delegate to the those around her. I’m not suggesting she ask for help (because she shouldn’t have to) but literally volun-tell Santa and the elves what their responsibilities are. Teenagers can bake cookies and wrap presents. School-agers can help clean and decorate. Partners can handle a list and go from store to store to pick up various gifts and other items. If the holidays are supposed to be enjoyed by everyone, that should mean everyone. And no, Mrs Claus doesn’t just get joy out of watching her family revel in all of her efforts. She deserves to have her favourite kind of cookie on the tray, a mug of her favourite hot beverage, a gift carefully and thoughtfully chosen for her by those who love her.
It's supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year. So, if you have a Mrs Claus in your life, go out of your way to make sure she feels it, too. Mend the holes in her pockets without her having to ask. Because let’s face it—she’s exhausted.
