Something magical happens when parents become grandparents. Suddenly, it’s a second shot at gently steering kids down the right path. This time, likely, without all the pressure and uncertainties from the first round. And with that, grandparents play a critical role in a child’s development and future. Which is why you are likely wondering how to contribute to your grandchild's future. A Cong & Silverstein study in rural China — a place where parent-grandparent co-parenting is common — found considerable benefits to grandparents lending a hand, including valuable support for parents, enabling them more financial attainability, fewer depressive symptoms and overall improved satisfaction with life. Beyond the cuddles, treats and the stream of affirmative permissions that come from grandparent doting, keep reading for more on how to contribute — emotionally and financially — to your grandchild’s future from birth and beyond.
Emotional contributions
Show unconditional love: Grandparents are known for showering their grandchildren with love unconditionally. After all, the “I’m calling Grandma” business is thriving. This love builds a safe and secure foundation for kids as they grow and develop, establishing grandparents as safe and trustworthy people in their lives.
Come in strong with quality time: Quality time is a way to build bonds and create core memories. If you live close by, you can host family dinners, have sleepovers, offer to babysit at a regular cadence and show up for extracurricular activities and events. If you live too far to be a regular in-person presence, make yourself available for phone calls or texts. Technology has evolved so much that you can even use FaceTime at bedtime to read a story, sing a lullaby, or hear daily reports.
Share life lessons and give emotional support: Older and wiser, grandparents are brimming with knowledge and experience. This expertise can act as an important shepherding staff for impressionable grandchildren. However, it’s important to strike a balance when listening and advising. Just like your own kids, some lessons are best learned independently. What’s always encouraged is to let grandchildren know that you are always there to talk and offer emotional support through the good and the bad.
Pass down tradition and culture: Oftentimes, grandparents are the gatekeepers to cherished family recipes — you know, the SECRET chocolate chip cookie recipe on the back of the Tollhouse bag? — customs and traditions. Sharing these rituals and cultures is an important interaction to extend the family legacy and build a strong relationship with your grandchildren. Whether it’s cabbage roll-making, pierogi-pinching, finding the perfect tree, celebrating festivals, building ofrendas or sharing the tall tales that make your family’s lore, pass it down the line and help bridge the gap and extend the legacy.
Financial Contributions: Setting Up Grandchildren for Success
Emotional contributions are, of course, so important. But if you’re in a position to set your grandchildren up for financial success, try these tips. Reminder: Taking care of your family is great, but don’t overextend yourself financially. Make sure you’ve put your own financial needs first.
RESP contributions: Grandparents can contribute to an RESP (Registered Education Saving Plan), a non tax-deductable account. Investments in an RESP can grow without getting taxed upon withdrawal, and be used for educational expenses like tuition, books and supplies.
Early investments: Bonds, stocks and mutual funds are a place to park investments on behalf of your grandchildren. Family trusts and gifting caps also can go towards your grandchildren. Talk to your financial advisor to learn more.
Gifts: Cash gifts can be made for special occasions like birthdays, graduations and holidays.
Inheritance and life insurance: It’s not fun to think about, but passing assets along through your will is another way to set your grandchildren up. Of course, this financial contribution is dependant on your passing, which hopefully will be when your grandchildren are adults, but can still be a way to help them get a house or building savings for their own children’s financial future. A whole life insurance policy can be set up to provide grandchilren with a lump sum.
Supporting without overstepping
A present grandparent is great, but it’s equally important to not overstep. Find your balance by ensuring you respect parental decisions and keeping communication lines open and strong. It’s OK to be doting but don’t spoil your grandchildren. And just like boundaries set by your children, set your own, too. It’s awesome to want to be available, but boundaries can help ensure that you don’t feel resentful or taken advantage of.
